+15°C / 59°F This is as warm as it gets in Finland, so we'll start here. People in Spain wear winter-coats and gloves. The Finns are out in the sun, getting a tan.
+10°C / 50°F The French are trying in vain to start their central heating. The Finns plant flowers in their gardens.
+5°C / 41°F Italian cars won't start, The Finns are cruising in cabriolets.
0°C / 32°F Distilled water freezes. The water in Vantaa river (in Finland) gets a little thicker.
-5°C / 23°F People in California almost freeze to death. The Finns have their final barbecue before winter.
-10°C / 14°F The Brits start the heat in their houses. The Finns start using long sleeves.
-20°C / -4°F The Aussies flee from Mallorca. The Finns end their Midsummer celebrations. Autumn is here.
-30°C / -22°F People in Greece die from the cold and disappear from the face of the earth. The Finns start drying their laundry indoors.
-40°C / -40°F Paris start cracking in the cold. The Finns stand in line at the hotdog stands.
-50°C / -58°F Polar bears start evacuating the North Pole. The Finnish army postpones their winter survival training awaiting real winter weather.
-60°C / -76°F Korvatunturi (the home for Santa Claus) freezes. The Finns rent a movie and stay indoors.
-70°C / -94°F The false Santa moves south. The Finns get frustrated since they can't store their Kossu (Koskenkorva vodka) outdoors. The Finnish army goes out on winter survival training.
-183°C / -297.4°F Microbes in food don't survive. The Finnish cows complain that the farmers' hands are cold.
-273°C / -459.4°F ALL atom-based movent halts. The Finns start saying "Perkele, it's cold outside today."