25 reasons why HOCKEY is better than SEX

  1. It's ok to bleed during play.
  2. If it's a bad game, you can call a time out.
  3. Every player usually has two or three sticks to choose from.
  4. There is a limit to the sizes of all equipment.
  5. You can still play when you get married.
  6. You can change on the fly.
  7. Anytime you see an open net, you can go for it.
  8. If you can't get it up, who cares?
  9. You can score on all the teams in the league over and over.
  10. You can pull the goalie without getting yelled at!
  11. It is broadcast live on TV.
  12. Everyone can shoot at the same goal.
  13. You can shoot in the goal and it's a good thing!
  14. Because of the facemask, nothing can get in your eyes!
  15. You always know how big the stick is.
  16. It's legal to play hockey professionally.
  17. The puck is always hard.
  18. Protective equipment is reusable and you don't even have to wash it.
  19. It lasts a full hour.
  20. You know you're finished when the buzzer sounds.
  21. Your parents cheer when you score.
  22. Periods only last 20 minutes.
  23. You can count on it at least twice a week, 4 times a night.
  24. You can tell your friends about it afterwards.
  25. A two-on-one or three-on-one is not uncommon.