Recently discovered computer viruses

  • The AL GORE Virus
    (Causes your computer to just keep counting and counting)
  • The CLINTON Virus
    (Gives you a 7-Inch Hard Drive with NO memory)
  • The BOB DOLE (aka: VIAGRA) virus
    (Makes a new hard drive out of an old floppy)
  • The LEWINSKY virus
    (Sucks all the memory out of your computer, then Emails everyone about what it did)
  • The RONALD REAGAN virus
    (Saves your data, but forgets where it is stored)
  • The MIKE TYSON virus
    (Quits after two bytes)
  • The JACK KEVORKIAN virus
    (Deletes all old files)
  • The ELLEN DEGENERES virus
    (Disks can no longer be inserted)
  • The PROZAC virus
    (Totally screws up your RAM, but your processor doesn't care)
  • The JOEY BUTTAFUOCO virus
    (Only attacks minor files)
  • The ARNOLD SCHWARZENEGGER virus
    (Terminates some files and leaves, but will be back)
  • The LORENA BOBBITT virus
    (Reformats your hard drive into a 3.5 inch floppy, then discards it through Windows)