Top 10 Aphorisms

  1. Be nice to your kids. They'll choose your nursing home.
  2. Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder...
  3. There are 3 kinds of people: those who can count & those who can't.
  4. Sign on baby's bib: SPIT HAPPENS.
  5. Why is "abbreviation" such a long word?
  6. There are two types of pedestrian, the quick and the dead.
  7. Every morning is the dawn of a new error...
  8. A flying saucer results when a nudist spills his coffee.
  9. For people who like peace and quiet: a phoneless cord.
  10. If things get any worse, I'll have to ask you to stop helping me.