Top 10 Aphorisms

1. Be nice to your kids. They'll choose your nursing home.
2. Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder...
3. There are 3 kinds of people: those who can count & those who can't.
4. Sign on baby's bib: SPIT HAPPENS.
5. Why is "abbreviation" such a long word?
6. There are two types of pedestrian, the quick and the dead.
7. Every morning is the dawn of a new error...
8. A flying saucer results when a nudist spills his coffee.
9. For people who like peace and quiet: a phoneless cord.
10. If things get any worse, I'll have to ask you to stop helping me.