Q: What is 6.9?
A: Good sex interrupted by a period.
Q: What do a Rubix cube and a penis have in common?
A: The longer you play with them, the harder they get.
Q: What did one Lesbian Frog say to the other?
A: Gee, we really do taste like chicken.
Q: How are pubic hairs like parsley?
A: You push them aside before you eat.
Q: What's the difference between an airship and 365 blowjobs?
A: One is a Goodyear, the other is an excellent year.
Q: What is the ultimate definition of courage?
A: Two cannibals having oral sex.
Q: How do you tell that you have a high sperm count?
A: Your date has to chew before she swallows
Q: Why are electric trains like a mother's breasts?
A: They were both designed for the kids, but it's the fathers who are always playing with them.
Q: What is the difference between a paycheck and a penis?
A: You can always find a girl to blow your paycheck for you.
Q: What did the banana say to the vibrator?
A: "I don't know why you're shaking...she's gonna EAT me!"
Q: What is the difference between pink and purple?
A: The grip
Q: What happens if you put the Energizer Bunny's batteries in backwards?
A: He keeps coming and coming and coming...
Q: What is the speed for sex?
A: 68 - because if you go 69 you turn over
Q: How do you tell if you're making love to a nurse, a schoolteacher, or an airline stewardess?
A: A nurse says: "This won't hurt a bit." A schoolteacher says, "We're going to have to do this over and over again until we get it right." An airline stewardess says, "Just hold this over your mouth and nose, and breath normally."
Q: How did Dairy Queen get pregnant?
A: Burger King didn't cover his Whopper.
Q: Why did god invent alcohol?
A: So fat women can get laid too.
Q: Why did Mickey Mouse divorce Minnie Mouse?
A: Because she was fucking Goofy.
Q: What is the difference between erotic sex and kinky sex?
A: During erotic sex you use a feather, during kinky sex you use the whole chicken.
Q: What did the hurricane say to the coconut tree?
A: "Hold on to your nuts, this is going to be one heck of a blowjob!"
Q: Who is the most popular man in a nudist colony?
A: The one who can carry 2 large coffees and a dozen donuts.
Q: Who is the most popular woman in a nudist colony?
A: The one who can eat the last two donuts.
Q: What does KFC and a woman have in common?
A: Once you're done with the breasts and the thighs, there's still a greasy box to put your bone in.
Q: What did the egg say to the boiling water?
A: "It might take me a while to get hard I just got laid last night."
Q: Why did the former porn actor get fired from his job as a gas station attendant?
A: Right before the tanks were full, he would pull out the nozzle and spray gas all over the car.
Q: What do a pizza delivery man and a gynecologist have in common?
A: They can both smell it but they can't eat it
Q: How is the card game Bridge and sex alike?
A: If you don't have a good partner you better have a good hand.
Q: What is the difference between a 69 and driving in the fog?
A: When driving in the fog, you can't see the asshole in front of you?
Q: What did the dick say to the condom?
A: "Cover me, I'm going in!"
Q: Why did Eve bite the forbidden apple?
A: Because it tasted better than Adam's banana.
Q: How can you tell if a witch is horny?
A: Check out which end of the broomstick she's riding.