Q: What's the last thing that goes through a bug's mind when it hits your windshield?
A: His ass.
Q: Why are Star Trek and toilet paper the same?
A: They both fight cling-ons and circle Uranus.
Q: What meat do priests eat?
Q: What is green and smells like pork?
A: Kermit's finger.
Q: How do you get a polish woman pregnant?
A: Cumm on her shoes and let the flies do the rest.
Q: Why can't the polish women use vibrators?
A: They chip their teeth.
Q: What is the difference between a wife and a job?
A: After 15 years your job still sucks.
Q: Why was Frosty the snowman happy?
A: He heard the snow-blower was coming.
Q: Why does a gog lick his balls?
A: Because he can.
Q: Why did the Greek boy leave home?
A: He didn't like how his father was rearing him.
Q: Why did the Greek boy return?
A: He couldn't stand to leave his brother's behind.
Q: How did Helen Keller burn her ear?
A: She answered the iron.
Q: How did she burn the other?
A: They called back.
Q: Why did God give women legs?
A: So they wouldn't leave snail trails.
Q: What is a vampire's tea-bag?
A: A tampon.
Q: What did one rubber say to the other as they passed a gay bar?
A: Want to go in and get shit-faced?
Q: What did one gay guy say to another as they passed a morgue?
A: Want to go suck down a cold one?
Q: What do you get when you cross a 10 foot pole with a rooster?
A: A ten foot cock that wants to reach out and touch someone.
Q: Why did God make women the way they are?
A: So you can carry them like a six-pack when tey get drunk.
Q: What do you get when you cross a donkey with an onion?
A: A piece of ass that makes your eyes water.
Q: What are the three biggest lies men tell women?
A: I love you, the check is in the mail, and I won't cumm in your mouth.
Q: Do you know what "taint" is?
A: It's the space between a woman's pussy and asshole. Taint quite pussy and taint quite asshole.
Q: What did the three-legged say when he walked in the bar?
A: I'm looking for the man who shot my pa (paw).
Q: What's the difference between a hockey player and a polish woman?
A: The hockey player changes his pad every 3 periodes.
Q: How can you tell if your boyfriend is a bisexual?
A: His dick tastes like shit.
Q: What is a gay guy's favorite pick up line?
A: Mind if I push your stool in?
Q: What's five bad things about being a penis?